Growing up, I, like most little girls, wanted to be a “star.” Dressing up in my mothers lipstick and jewelry, I’d prance around the house, microphone hairbrush in tow, dreaming of the day I’d see my name in lights. If you were anything like me, you, too, have memories of standing in front of the mirror while doing your best Sally Field impersonation.
“You like me! You really like me!”
To be honest, all of this award show preparation was really just a huge waste of time because while I knew I wanted the award, I never figured out what I’d be winning it for…which is to say, I never knew what kind of star I wanted to be…but as a young girl, that didn’t matter to me. All I knew was I wanted to be a star and if you would’ve asked me what kind I’d have told you, “the kind that shines BRIGHT!”
Today, I watched a video that brought me to tears. The headline read, “This Middle School Football Team Went Behind Their Coaches’ Backs To Do Something Incredible”..and incredible it was. An act of pure selflessness from the demographic you’d least expect…12-year-old boys.
But it wasn’t so much the act that brought me to tears as the idea behind it. The idea of, “I don’t have to have this moment. I can give it to someone else just to make their day,” was a welcome reminder that oftentimes, it really is better to give than to receive.
So many of us live with the mentality , “always the bridesmaid, never the bride”. We get upset because we want our “blessings” and/or our “breakthroughs” and they are not coming fast enough. If we are being truthful, we always go over and beyond to help and do favors for others. Yet, when we ask them for a favor, it seems the answer is always “no, I can’t” or “I just don’t have time.” We pour so much into people around us while it seems that no one raises a finger to replenish what we have so unselfishly given. So we find ourselves lonely, depressed, and hurt.
My friends, it is time for us to develop a different point of view. Maybe we are not meant to be ordinary stars… maybe we are meant to be supernovas.
When my oldest son, Zion, was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes, I tried to work. At that time I’d also applied and been accepted to law school. And though these things were self-fulfilling, my son needed me more, so I gave it all up to come home. With the support of my mom, dad, and husband, I became a stay-at-home mom. Sometimes I found myself bitter and depressed. I was angry that I had given up so much and my husband moved right along with his career. People had such high expecations of what my career would be and I was embarrassed to be an at-home-mom, and not out in the world, living up to what was expected of me. It wasn’t until my kids started school that my sacrifice became more than just a cross to bear. Teachers began to comment on how smart and polite the kids were at school and I realized that the amount of time I spent with my kids was more priceless and valuable than any law school class I could have attended. Larry, Mo, and Curly are my little stars and they deserve every opportunity that I was afforded and more. They are because I am. I am their supernova. Their light shines because of the light and energy that radiates from me, their dad, our family and our friends.
At night when we look into the sky, we admire all the stars that dazzle and twinkle overhead, sometimes seeming so close that we think we might be able to reach up and pluck one from the sky. But the truth is, many of those stars are so far away that their light has literally traveled through space and time to reach us. These stars are so far away that many of them are no longer stars…but supernovas, beautifully expanding into the universe creating new matter, new energy, new stars, and thus, new life.
Maybe that’s what you are – a supernova; a giver of life, a carrier of hope. Without you many people would not have accomplished their goals. Without you, many people would not even be. It takes a strong person to be a supernova. You don’t get credit when you KNOW you deserve it. Sometimes people will turn on you out of jealousy and/or fear that you will outshine them. They see how bright your light is and they are intimidated. Sometimes I find myself trying to be incognito and low key, but it never works. My personality is not one to sit on the sidelines. As the famous Dirty Dancing line goes, “Nobody puts baby in the corner” (in my Patrick Swayze voice).
Over the years I’ve learned one thing – I don’t have to be the star of the show, and rarely do I ever want to be. Believe it or not, it takes a lot for me to write about my life in this forum. However, if it can help someone else have a brighter day and help them realize that we are all “superstars”, then I will gladly be the author of that passage or that word that energizes and illuminates their lives.
The middle school football team in the video above did one kind act that has positively changed the lives of others for a lifetime. That one yard will last for miles! What about you? Will you take the ball all the way down the field and stop just before you make the touchdown? Would you give the ball to someone else just to make them feel special and smile? I WOULD in a heartbeat. That’s who I am. I’m not called to be an ordinary star. I am called to be a supernova.
I may not be in the newspaper. I may not be on television. You may not even know that an idea is mine, and I am okay with that…. yes, I really am. It took me a while to get to this point but I promise you, once you see yourself as the “superstar” that you are called to be, your light will be brighter.
I’ll give my hand to those who cannot see,
The sunshine or the fallin’ rain.
I’ll sing my song to cheer the weary along,
For I may never pass this way again!
I’ll share my faith with every troubled heart,
So I shall not have lived in vain.
I’ll give my hand, I’ll sing my song,
I’ll share my faith, because I know,
That the time is now to fulfill each vow,
For I may never pass this way again!
Words and Music by
Murray Wizel and Irving Melcher
arranged by Jack Andrews
Today let’s scream “I may not be the star you know, but I am a supernova – and my light can illuminate us all”.
Your forever Screaming Child,
The Screaming Child 
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